31! 31! 31!
by Beer Good
Summary: Took up a challenge: There's 31 days in January, I've got a list of 31 Buffyverse characters to write, that's one 100 word drabble every day the whole month. Will I manage it? And will they be any good? Only one way to find out. Jan 31st: YAY! Complete!
1. Intro

OK, I've taken up a challenge to try to write at least one 100-word drabble a day throughout January. I have a list of 31 Buffyverse characters ranging from Buffy and Angel to Holtz and Mr Trick, there's 31 days in January, so that's at least 31 scenes I gotta come up with.

No time like the present, of course. So ready... steady... drabble!


	2. Lindsey McDonald

**Information Wants To Be Free**

Back in the mailroom, he finds Brad loading up the cart.

"So what'd Mr Manners want?"

"Nothing big." Lindsey shrugs, head still spinning. "Had a special package for someone."

"Good. Don't worry about him; between you and me, I just overheard some very interesting information. Seems Mr Manners is in for a nasty surprise at next week's board meeting." Chuckles. "Don't go tellin' him that, though."

"Why would I? I mean, it's not like he's offered to pay my way through law school in exchange for information, is it?" Lindsey laughs at the absurdity. "C'mon, gimme a hand with this..."

* * *

**Cops Suck**

"License and registration please, Sir."

"Ain't got none."

"Step out of the car please, Sir."

It's routine by now; legs apart, hands on the hood. The cop asks for ID; he hands over the business card.

"This you? Wolfram & Hart?"

"Yup."

The cop almost salutes him, suddenly very nervous. "S-so sorry to bother you, Sir. I'll just be... You have a good day now, Sir."

The cruiser disappears in a cloud of dust before Lindsey has even gotten back behind the wheel. He briefly considers doing something about the back of the truck, but... nah. It's fun watchin' 'em squirm.


	3. Fred Burkle

**Better Than That**

Wesley letting her fight her own battle scares her - like he's humoring her. But she belongs in the lab; she's a published scientist, she _will_ find a solution. He helps her stand. She thinks she's onto something, then she can't see, glass tubes shatter in her hand but don't even cut her skin. She tries again but suddenly she's on the floor, going down fighting but going _down_, dying in an evil place and Wesley loves her but she can't feel his arms anymore and there's a portal another friggin' _portal_ but

it closes

can't scream

it's just

not

FAIR -


	4. Wesley WyndamPryce

**The Only One To Grieve**

"Hello, is this the Shady Oaks Rest Home? May I speak to Mrs Morgan, please."

"..."

"Mrs Morgan? My name is Wesley Wyndam-Pryce..."

"..."

"Actually, I'm sorry... It's about your daughter."

"..."

"Yes, I know she's not there, I'm..."

"..."

"Mrs Morgan... your daughter is dead."

"..."

"Lilah, yes."

"..."

"No, I'm... quite certain she didn't visit you yesterday."

"..."

"I'm... We... knew each other."

"..."

"I just wanted you to know that her death was... that she didn't... she cared a great deal for you and... she'll be missed."

"..."

"_Lilah._ Your _daughter_, you seni-"

"..."

"No, I don't want to talk to... Goodbye, Mrs Morgan. My condolences."


	5. Drusilla

**Creepy and Kooky **

"Spike, wake up."

"Zzzmfff... Wha'issiluv?"

"I'm trapped in a box."

"'s not a box." Yawn. "'s a hotel, Dru."

"Not the room. That... box."

Spike opened his eyes and looked at her. Then he looked at the black and white TV in the corner and sighed.

"For the last time: it's not a box, it's a television. That's not you, that's Morticia Addams. She's a fictional character played by an actor named Carolyn Jones. Now go back to slee –"

"_You rang?"_

Spike paused as Lurch, all stiff and forehead-y, came on screen. "Hang on. What's Angel doing on TV?"


	6. Willow Rosenberg

**Like, This Cleavagey Slutbomb **

Faith ran from the church, blonde hair flowing. Then a beat-up brunette limped outside.

"Buff?" Willow ran up and grabbed her friend... y'know, so she didn't stumble or anything. "You OK?"

"_Man_, I hit hard."

"The spell didn't work, huh?"

"Duh, still in Faith's body."

"Sorry 'bout that, but, y'know..." Willow laughed nervously. "As bodies go... I mean, so what if you're stuck like this, would that really be... hey, if life gives you mel- uh, lemons..."

"Will, are you staring at my... Faith's boobs?"

"What? No! Nosireebob, I... I..."

Buffy frowned. "How come the spell didn't work anyway?"

* * *

_A/N: I've spun this drabble off into the longer one-shot "Wow", which at least I think is a lot of fun. If you're into the whole femslashy bedroom farce thing._


	7. Lilah Morgan

**Stalemate**

"Leave them on."

It shouldn't sting like it does. This was supposed to be a game, she's a queen and he's just a pawn (possibly a knight, two steps forward and one across). Something to corrupt - a little white in her black, if you'll pardon the metaphor.

_You called this a relationship._ But no matter how deep inside her he is, he still wants what she's not. So she takes him, glasses and schoolgirl uniform on. Bites her tongue. Doesn't look into his eyes when she comes, leaves in silence after he does. Plays to win, since she's already lost.


	8. Daniel 'Oz' Osbourne

**OOC**

"...and I'm like halfway through this kick-ass solo when my E string breaks and I'm like 'No way!' and I try to like bring it down and just groove while I change guitars but then Devon's like 'Guitar!' and I'm like 'Dude, I broke a fuckin' _string_' and he's like 'Woah!' but then my Telecaster isn't tuned and I'm like 'Dude!' and... where're you goin'?"

"Bathroom...?"

"Cool. Hurry back, babe." He smacks his girlfriend's ass as Buffy drags her away.

"Two hours. Two HOURS." Buffy shudders. "Promise that's the last time we let Oz get drunk?"

Willow just whimpers.

* * *

_A/N: Yes, of course OOC stands for "Oz On Coors"._


	9. Anya Lameass Madeup Maidenname

**Aud**

Aud loves to fall asleep on Olaf's chest, listening to his tales about life as a Viking. About the high seas. About battles. About the blood-stained gold they bring back. About ravens feasting upon the flesh of their enemies. About valkyries, the winged women who bring fallen heroes up to Valhalla to dine with Odin until the end of the world.

Even about women that he, Torbjörn and Erik made merry sport with.

Because he changed. He gave up all of that for her.

Every night she falls asleep on his chest and knows it will always be like this.

* * *

**Anyanka**

"She wished WHAT?"

"I know. Isn't it exciting?"

"Damn. Even I think that's extreme."

"'Extreme', Hallie? Did you _hear_ how many servant girls he slept with? He deserves to pay."

"Yes, but... Anyanka, honey, this is... Do you realize how many women and children will suffer with him?"

"That's too bad, but what am I gonna do? They wish it, we dish it – not much room for interpretation here. Besides, historically speaking, invasions are unavoidable anyway."

"Fine, but where are you going to find a horde of pillaging invaders?"

"I've asked around. Seems there's this guy in Mongolia named Genghis..."

* * *

**Anya**

They're coming.

The floor shakes.

The lockers lining the wall shake.

Andrew shakes.

Her hands don't.

She stands.

She thinks about the times she ran. She thinks about the times she made others run. She thinks about how easy it is to go along. She thinks about how easy it is to kill from a distance. She thinks about rumours, curses, diseases, revolutions, hordes, wars, apocalypses.

They're coming.

She thinks about Buffy.

She thinks about Xander.

She thinks about Olaf. She's still angry with him; she wouldn't be Anya otherwise.

She thinks about herself.

She stands.

She falls.

She stands.

* * *

**Aud**

Willow is still loopy, her mind fizzing and popping with pure white energy and victory. But the fog lifts, and suddenly she's aware that Xander is slowly sitting down on the dusty highway out of Sunnydale. She counts heads and realizes.

She holds him. They don't speak or cry, not yet; it hurts too much.

"Hey, what's that?" Dawn, squinting at the bright sky.

All of them, even Xander, look up. They can almost, but not quite, make out the shapes of ancient women. Giant, invisible wings flapping. Descending into the crater, then rising again.

They bow to the valkyries.


	10. Charles Gunn

**If You Kill Him, I'm Gonna Lose You **

They're in the professor's office, and she's in his arms as the portal opens. She begs him to help her, her hands pulling him close, her lips on his... then his hands around her delicate neck, snapping it like a twig, pushing her into the abyss.

Then he wakes up, panting, and she's lying next to him, eight inches of cold bed between them and a thousand miles away.

He remembers the first time he saw her, standing with the sun in her hair, bloody hand raised. Funny how easy blood shifts. Funny how hard it is to wash off.


	11. Faith Lehane

**Faith**

OK, it wasn't her walkman – couldn't afford one – but she was gonna give it back. And sure, she wasn't supposed to listen to heavy metal in class, but come on, it's not like she's ever going to need to know about Milton and shit. So when Miss Thompson shoved her feet off the desk and ripped the headphones from her head, Faith told her exactly where she could stick _Paradise Lost_.

Of course her mom found out, so on Sunday Faith had to go to confession with a black eye. Again. Wondering why she had to say _she_ had sinned.

* * *

**The Vampire**

She liked visiting days. Not that she'd ever tell him that; he knew, there was no need to bring it up. She was never good with gratitude.

The guards called him "The Priest". Hey, all in black, somber-looking, hung up on good and evil... Close enough. She wondered how they'd react if she told them his kill count, though.

They'd talk about... stuff. Just shootin' the shit, or about things they had done. Sometimes, he'd be more tore up than her about something, and she wondered who was the prisoner here.

Sometimes he didn't show for weeks. She knew then.

* * *

**Slayer**

She knelt beside Buffy on the slimy floor. "Thought you were more badass than this, B." She had to shout to be heard over the noise and screams.

"Mine's the good ass, remember?" Buffy staggered painfully to her feet. "I'm _not_ going back in there!"

"C'mon, what's a little violence between friends?" Faith leaned in, grinning, lips to Buffy's ear. "I'll make it worth your while...?"

Buffy blushed and shot her The Look before limping off towards the bar, muttering about satanic cults. As "Raining Blood" kicked in, Faith screamed in ecstasy - "SLAYEEEEEEERRRR!" - and dove back into the mosh pit.


	12. Riley Finn

**How Riley Got That Scar**

_Iowa_

Christmas on the farm before leaving for Nicaragua was just what Riley needed; time to relax, think about his life, and Buffy. He knew he'd been right to end it, but...

As he cleaned out the toolshed one morning, a shovel hanging on the wall came loose somehow. Riley barely had time to look up before it hit him right in the face.

_Sunnydale_

Tara loved hearing Willow talk in her sleep and trying to figure out what she was dreaming.

Usually.

This, however, was creepy.

"'Fyou hurt'er... beat you... shhhovel..."

And since when were her eyes that dark?


	13. Gwen Raiden

**It's Hard Out There For A Pimp  
**_Remember that guy who tried to pick up Faith at the bus station...?_

Three months.

It took him three months to fully recover from the beating the Bitch From Hell™ gave him. Between medical bills, a trashed apartment, and a low profile until the cops forgot him... he needed a new girl pronto.

As she stepped off the bus, he smiled. Young, beautiful, dark hair, red lips, alone... perfect.

"New in town, right? You got that new-in-town look. It's a dangerous part of town this time of night..." He put a protective, big-brotherly arm around her shoulders and

ZAP

woke up three days later. His hands shook for the rest of his life.

* * *

**Reciprocity**

When you have the power to take life, sooner or later it becomes a toy. Something to play with.

Like Gunn. She touched him, and his heart stopped. He died. Life ended. She touched him again, and his heart beat. From off to on, just like that.

The LISA looked like something you buy at Radio Shack. Something that runs on batteries, plays games or tells time. A toy.

He touched her, and her heart stopped. She thought she'd died. He kept touching her, and her heart beat like never before. Life began. From off to on, just like that.


	14. Dawn Summers

**Numb**

This isn't real.

Dawn is used to things not real, things never happening.

She never screamed at Mom for leaving Dad and moving to Sunnydale.

She never blackmailed Buffy about Angel coming to her window.

She never spent all summer worried sick about her sister.

She never saw snow.

She was never held hostage by Faith.

NONE OF THIS HAPPENED.

So logically, she never found Tara cold in a pool of blood.

She never pleaded for her to get up.

She never spent hours banging her own head against the wall, trying to wake up.

No.

No.

No.

Not happening.


	15. Daniel Holtz

**He Who Fights Monsters Must See To It...**

The pain feels like justice. Two holes, like those in his wife's and daughter's necks.

Holtz kills monsters. It's what he does. It's what he's sworn to do.

_"Papa, no! Please, no, papa! Papa, don't. Let me go!"_

Watching the Thing that was his daughter burn, every night for 240 years. Teaching himself to hate. Justice.

_"Take him."_

18 years in hell, teaching Stephen to hate. Justice.

Justine is crying. He knows what it's like to kill what you love, but justice must be served.

"Again. Again!"

Justine kills monsters. It's what she does. It's what she's sworn to do.


	16. Angel

**Killing Angel By Degrees (100 Fahrenheit)**

Slowly, the world stopped spinning. He was soaked through and through, and his limbs felt heavier than ever before. He could hear the last of the blood-tainted water run out through the drain below him and tried in vain to move.

Then the hatch opened and Fred hauled him out, holding him up triumphantly. "See? Told ya Tide gets demon blood out."

Gunn shrugged. "Fine. I still say we shouldn't have let him fight like that..."

"Oh, don't worry, Angel's tough. Ain'tcha, big guy?" Fred cuddled him before opening the next hatch.

PuppetAngel protested weakly. "No... not the dryer... please..."


	17. Cordelia Chase

**Best Supporting**

Ever since she was a little girl, Cordelia Chase had the same dream: She's on stage, heavy gold statuette in her hands, a sea of ballgowns and tuxedos applauding her as she thanks the Academy, Mom, and of course her almost-as-fantastic-as-her co-stars.

Except Cordelia doesn't sleep much at night anymore. She catches a few minutes here and there in the gray hours before dawn, and if she has time, at lunch. At night, she's down in the sewers, heavy tools or weapons in her hands.

No one applauds her. No one thanks her.

She's living the dream. And fighting nightmares.

* * *

**18th Century Digital Boy**

"_Cordelia!_"

Angel's panicking again. She lets him stew in his own juices for a few minutes – for his own good, he has to learn - before going into his office.

"It just beeps at me. If I wanted something that beeped at me, I'd get a canary. What was wrong with handwritten letters and telegrams anyway?"

She rolls her eyes, takes the offending object, enters the PIN code and hands it back to him with a withering look.

"Oh. Nevermind, it's working again."

She swears that one day she'll just ignore him until he breaks down crying over his cell phone.


	18. Ethan Rayne

**Parole**

It's raining the day the army lets Ethan out, "under supervision". He snorts when he sees who that is, but gets in the car.

Windshield wipers fight a losing battle.

"So, Ripper... what's the plan? Don't suppose you could just drop me off at the airport?"

"You know I can't do that." No rage there anymore, just cold. "We're going to Cleveland. Council Headquarters."

"Have better dungeons there, do you?"

Giles ignores the question, and all others for the remainder of the drive. The rain pounds down. Ethan raises an eyebrow as Giles pushes the car over the speed limit.


	19. Clem

**Excess Skin, and What It's For  
**_NOTE: This will probably turn up in a future chapter of my fic "My Demon Lover". ALSO, I should point out that this particular drabble is rated NC-17, or M, or X, or whichever rating you prefer. Do not read unless you're over 18, is the gist of what I'm trying to say. Some people might find this wrong. I think it's beautiful._

She searched for his cock among the folds of skin, taking him in her mouth before straddling him. It took all her Slayer flexibility to work herself down the swelling shaft as his wrinkles smoothed out leaving a handsome, muscular body and all that skin was _inside_ her, throbbing, pounding, filling up every cubic inch until the word "orgasm" seemed hopelessly inadequate.

"CLEE-E-E-E-E-M!"

Buffy felt him coming deep inside her and collapsed on his chest, shivering, shot through with light. As he slowly slipped out of her, his appearance returned to the normal wrinkly face she had come to love.


	20. Alexander 'Xander' Harris

**THREE WAYS XANDER DOESN'T DIE (or lives forever)**

* * *

**Yellow Lights Mean Slow Down, Not Speed Up** (The Harvest)

Cordelia shrugs; Willow left The Bronze with "some guy". Xander searches all night, and finally finds her outside the cemetary; pale, still, lifeless. "Will... please... wake up..." He shakes her, hot tears on his cheeks, doesn't dare check her pulse, refuses to feel how cold she is (_just hypothermia, just dew, she's NOT..._) "WILL!"

"Xander...?" Weakly, green eyes flutter open.

"Oh thank God..." He hugs her. "Don't EVER scare me like that again! Are you OK?"

"F-fine... Just really..."

"Cold?"

"Hungry." Suddenly her eyes are yellow and she's _on_ him and there's teeth and pain and then... blood.

He drinks.

* * *

**I'm Not Able, I'm Just Cain** (Primeval) 

As they sprint through the battle in the Inititive, they're just a little bit too slow. A panicking soldier has his gun on automatic, Buffy doesn't duck in time, takes four or five hits and goes down; Willow instinctively runs to her and another bullet spills those oh-so-clever brains on the concrete. Xander stares, then screams and turns his blaster on the soldier, frying him to a crisp. But he's one against many.

Later, Adam discards his bullet-riddled torso, but his hands and eyes make an excellent addition to the hybrid army that slowly takes over the world.

* * *

**Many Years From Now** (Future)

"In other news, best-selling novelist Alexander Harris passed away today after suffering an apparent heart attack in his sleep. Mr Harris is mostly remembered for his Pulitzer Prize-winning 2036 novel _Heart And Soul Long_, and for his allegedly autobiographical horror novel _The One Who Got Out_, both of which were successful 3D motion picture experiences and still play regularly all over the world. In a recent interview, he spoke of his 'wild youth' and of the importance of learning from experience. He leaves behind his wife Anya, their two children and five grandchildren. Alexander Harris was 83 years old."


	21. Allen Francis Doyle

**Brogue Demon Hunters**

"So... Doyle, where are you from then?"

"Tought it was obvious? Ireland."

"Yeah, but where exactly? I've been trying to place your accent..."

"Fancy ya know Irish accents, do ya? Ever been dere?"

"Why, aye. Born an' raa...eee...iized." And Angel set about to prove his birthplace by, for the next ten minutes, speaking in a long-neglected dialect that might - _might_ - have passed for Irish on... oh, say, American TV.

All his tortured vowels earned him, though, was a healthy gutlaugh and a slap on the shoulder. "Nice try, pal. Tell ya what, rent _De Commitments_ again and practice some more."


	22. Mr Trick

**Ascension**

The Harlem demon bar grew quiet as Mr Trick entered and ordered an AB-. He gulped it down and ordered another before speaking.

"Trane's dead. Just came from the hospital. Cancer got him."

Disappointed and angry murmurs spread throughout the bar. "Yo, Trick, I recall you bragging yesterday about 'I'm gonna sire John Coltrane, talent like that gotta live forever' and so on? What happen, you chicken out?"

Mr Trick shook his head. "I was going to, I was right there, but then I thought... what's the point? The music would be dead anyway." He sighed. "Cat had SOUL, man."

* * *

_Author's note: for those who know nothing about jazz - John Coltrane (1926-1967), sax player who did indeed have soul. And died way too young after crushing just about every single musical border there was._


	23. Tara Maclay

**Weakness**  
_Timeline: summer between s5/s6._

Willow hates her freckles. She'd never say so, but the trouble she goes to to hide them – make-up, long sleeves – says enough. Once Buffy suggested that she should dress a little sexier; Willow responded with a rant about pale skin, sun and skin cancer. That's not it, though.

Everyone thinks Willow's the strongest, "the boss of us" who carries Buffy's absence on her shoulders.

At night, Tara holds her until the shaking stops. There's a cluster of freckles right below Willow's shoulderblade; she runs her hand across it, kisses it. It's a part of Willow only she gets to see.

* * *

**Even if she never...**  
_Timeline: alt future, years after "Tough Love"_

Tara has good days.

She has days when things almost make sense. She can string thoughts together, look at the woman next to her and remember her name. She sees red hair turning grey, lines forming around green eyes. She knows Willow still loves her and will always take care of her, and wants to tell her to stop, it's useless, she's throwing her life away on someone who will never get better.

Those days are few and far between. Mostly it's all chaos, confusion, terror, insanity and nothing makes sense.

Those are the good days. When she doesn't know.


	24. Lorne of the Deathwok Clan

**How Do I Get To Carnegie Hall?**

Basic rule of showmanship: don't listen to your own records. Especially if you can tell people's future by hearing them sing.

Lorne has been handing out "Songs For The Love" for years, and never heard it himself. But Fred is dead and there are discarded CDs and bottles everywhere; nothing sounds right. All his idols (or at least their careers) are dead. He pops his own CD in and sits down to listen.

He cries for all of them.

Then he goes to the shooting range.

Basic rule of showmanship: practice, practice, practice. Come showtime, you gotta give it all.


	25. Darla

**Brave New World**

_Be bloody, bold, and resolute; laugh to scorn._

One of many things The Master taught her was to read and write. Something she'd never needed in life, but a useful quality in a minion.

_Be a whore still: they love thee not that use thee._

Obviously, the Bible wasn't suitable teaching material, and most novels and poems just bored her. But this young English playwright, Shaxpere, had some good bits; Lady Macbeth's plotting, Iago's mind games, Hamlet's revenge, the death scenes. And, oh yeah:

_The first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers._

That was a good one, too.


	26. Buffy Anne Summers

**Happy Meal, AKA How Buffy Saved The World And Didn't Even Know It  
**

"Welcome to Doublemeat Palace, how may I help you." Buffy's worked 14 hours straight; question marks don't exist.

The pale, tall man eyes the menu. "The Doublemeat Medley hassss beef in it, yesssss?"

Demon? Who cares. If all he wants is a burger... "Uh, yeah. Sure."

"Give me three dozzzzzzen."

Big appetite. Whatever. She hands them over, takes his (slightly slimy) money and forgets him before he's out the door.

Little known fact: Skirfnool demons must consume beef before rituals. Fake meat processes aren't enough. Their attempt to open the hellmouth ends in disappointment and a nasty case of salmonella.


	27. Andrew Wells

**Rounding Up The Troops**

"He's waking up."

"Great. Can I kill him now?"

"Kennedy..."

"He almost scared her off! Last thing we need's more psycho Slayers..."

Andrew opened his eyes. When Dawn and Kennedy glared at him he pretended to be unconscious again, but dropped the act when Dawn commanded:

"Get. Up."

He winced. "I think that girl broke my ribs."

"Serves you right." Kennedy pulled him upright. "Next time we track down a scared girl with brand-new Slayer strength, how do we NOT explain what we want and what the Council is?"

Andrew mumbled something.

"HOW?"

"'Resistance is futile. Prepare to be assimilated'."


	28. Connor AngelHoltzReilly

**Payback**

"What's that? What are you doing to him?"

"It's just a stethoscope, Mr Angel." The doctor looks puzzled; surely _everyone_ knows what a stethoscope is. "I'm checking his heartbeat."

Connor whimpers as the cold metal touches his chest, and Angel steps closer. "You're hurting him."

"Please, Mr Angel, I know what I'm doing." He lifts the stethoscope. "Connor is perfectly healthy. I'll just test his reflexes..." He puts his finger in Connor's tiny hand, then gasps in pain as the baby clutches it with superhuman strength. When he gets loose, there's blood pooling under his fingernail. "Healthy and... uh... strong."


	29. Justine Cooper

**Neither Neither Nor Nor**

Good and evil are fucking two feet from her cage, grunting, gasping, moaning as one. She can't always tell them apart from in here.

She's damned and taunted Wesley, pleaded to his good side, promised to be good, offered to be bad. He never cares; there's no forgiveness there.

Sometimes, Lilah opens her cage as Wesley sleeps. Gagged, Justine shoots her hateful looks that say _you can't buy me_. Lilah laughs and closes the door.

She's fallen between, too good for evil, too bad for good. They're having sex two feet from her cage, but it's Justine who is fucked.


	30. Rupert Giles

**A Slayer Slays, A Watcher Watches  
**_Timeline: "The Gift"_

It doesn't seem real until he lifts her. The pain as he pops the stitches in his side wakes him up. He was run through by a bloody _spear_, how can he be the one still breathing?

Her face is peaceful, dead before impact, but broken bones shift and her head lolls at a... _wrong_ angle. He cradles her carefully; she hardly weighs anything. Was she always this fragile? Some still-functioning part of his brain starts counting things he could have done differently.

Her watcher carries her home, refusing offers of help. Their blood drips and mixes on the pavement.


	31. Detective Kate Lockley

**All Scully**

The last case they let Kate solve before she's fired is open-and-shut, fit for a rookie or a washout. A man beat his wife to death for no reason whatsoever. His entire defense: "Bitch had it comin."

It's impossibly simple. Two years ago, she'd have been insulted. Now, she spends all night with her secret book collection looking for an Evil Thing that would do something like this. She finds feeding habits, sacrificial rites, mating seasons, but not "Bitch had it comin." He's all too human.

The man gets life.

A vampire saves hers.

She's still trying to solve that.


	32. William 'Spike' Pratt

**Five Things Spike Did That Eventually Got Him Barred From CBGBs**_  
Late 70s_

Kept bugging Debbie Harry for bleaching tips. Apologized by co-writing "Rip Her To Shreds", but too late.

Tried to eat Richard Hell, who had just shot up and managed to fight off a suddenly very drowsy Spike at the cost of his shirt. Spike still claims the punk look is his doing.

Wouldn't stop ranting about the Dead Boys being fucking poseurs.

Vamped Iggy Pop. Got upset when nobody noticed. Including Iggy.

People kept asking rookie DJs to play some Barry Manilow, just to see the expression on Spike's face. He didn't kill them, but sometimes the crowd almost did.

* * *

**Go West, Old Man  
**_Summer before season 7_**  
**

He had something. What was it? Big, growly, two wheels. Carried him for a while. Ran out of... Can't remember. Wasn't invented when he was... Gone now. Walks on his own now. Thirsts.

Sometimes forgets the sun. Rises behind him in the East, punishes, chars his skin. Unworthy. Hides. Dreams darkness in the daylight, 122 years compressed into hours. Voices in his head, hundreds, one, screaming, whimpering. "Please Spike please don't..." Laughing. Crying.

Sun sets in the West. Chases the spark, the disappearing glow every night, voices getting louder, world getting darker. Sunbeams like golden hair, just out of reach.

* * *

_Author's note: Well, that's it! It just occurred to me that with the intro, I ended up with 32 chapters... which looks weird, but what the heck. At least I got through the month without cheating, had some fun and got a couple of plot bunnies out of it. Huge thanks to all who read and reviewed, I really appreciate the support and feedback!_


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